Deep in the vast expanses of northern Kentucky, surrounded by absolutely nothing, lies Petersburg, a town which seems to exist for the sole purpose of providing an address for the Creation Museum, motto: prepare to believe.
I first read about the Creation Museum in a London newspaper during the Urchin Occupation of 2009. Let’s just say that in a country with currency graced by Darwin, the idea didn’t go over so well. I immediately knew I had to see the Creation Museum for myself. I hoped it would shed light on how and why people held such a belief.
When the Urchins began planning our recent road trip, it seemed to be a sign from Dave that we would be passing directly by the Creation Museum on our way to Vermont from Nashville. As Geo said, ‘It’s like our future post is writing itself.’
So on Sunday (naturally) 12 September, we put on our best straight faces, left our t-shirts emblazoned with evolution puns at home, and drove through the dinosaur flanked gates to enter the Creation Museum.
We did well at first. We discretely took pictures of a young mannequin cave girl playing with a dinosaur. We politely declined having our picture taken to raise funds for the museum. And then we got to this:
Despite all of my prior research, nothing could have prepared me for actually seeing this information displayed in museum format. As someone with a passion for learning, and especially as someone who grew up in Chicago and lived in London, both cities with some of the best museums in the world, I was devastated. I knew that this is what Creationists believed, but seeing it in person displayed as fact was stunning. I staggered around the first room for about fifteen minutes, intermittently wandering up to Margaret or Geo in a daze, asking, ‘Can you believe this?’
The Creation Museum is not a place dedicated to education. Many a placard would ask a question, only to never offer an answer! Margaret hypothesised that perhaps ‘God’ was supposed to be the answer to everything. I was infuriated that they would propose scientific questions only to leave the reader without knowledge of an answer.
Soon, however, my anger gave way to humoured enjoyment. Below are some of the Creation Museum’s reasons as to why the earth is 6,000 years old, dinosaurs and people coexisted, and Darwin’s theory of evolution is wrong:
We really tried to see where they were coming from.
But then we saw this:
And if you know the Urchins at all, you know how we feel about bestsellers (hint: see our Art & Money category.) We saw the above placard just moments after hearing a mother tell her son that if he read all the informational placards, she would count it towards his ‘reading minutes’ for the week. Our patience was wearing thin.
To save you the trouble of having to experience this for yourself, the take home point of the Creation Museum is that science is the work of fruity intellectuals (see exhibits A and B below) and that their ideas (such as the earth having existed for millions of years and evolution) are corrupting society and good Christian values (exhibit C, an anvil of a million years crushing a church).
And so we left, overwhelmed, but happy to have experienced this firsthand. At least now we can judge from an informed standpoint, which I fear is more than can be said for many Creationists and Evolutionists alike. And the Creation Museum did have one interesting point, which I was only able to capture in the following dimly lit picture:
Apparently people were vegan until Adam and Eve had to go and sin, and then God made them kill animals as a punishment, and made animals work and give away their milk to humans to show Adam and Eve that their actions ruined it for everyone. So, if people really love God, they should probably repent and go vegan. Right? Everyone? Anyone? Okay, it was worth a shot.