By Margaret Hedderman
The following is a portion of the transcript from last week’s Dem. vs. Rep. March Madness play-off game.
Bill: And he scores! Unbelievable 3-pointer for Obama. Boehner passes the ball to Palin and, oh my goodness, Palin lobs it down court. No one’s even down there!
Jon: Looks like Sarah Palin got a little excited. Someone actually passed to her.
Bill: They won’t be doing that again. Barton chases after the runaway ball. And it’s intercepted! Obama nabs the ball straight out of Barton’s fingers. Oh, and the Republicans are not happy about this.
Jon: Sounds like a herd of angry elephants in here.
Bill: Looks like it’ll be an easy lay-up for Obama. And… Holy Mackerel!
Jon: Did that just happen? I don’t believe my eyes!
Bill: Obama gives the ball to Boehner. Well this, I’ve never seen anything like this. In an act of… what appears to be generosity, Obama hands the ball over to the Republicans. Obama tosses the environment away! Look at that smirk on Boehner’s face.
Jon: And the crowd is… well, the crowd doesn’t seem to care. Look, there’s a guy playing with the new iPad. Seems like he’s having a bit of trouble, too.
Bill: And it’s half time with the Democrats 3 points ahead.
Jon: But for how long? Boy, I tell you, in a game this close… a play like that just seems foolhardy to me. What is Obama thinking?
Bill: This truly is March Madness. Straight off that miraculous healthcare 3-pointer, Obama stops, and literally gives the Republicans offshore drilling.
Bill: Gratitude’s against Republican strategy. But I’m still having a hard time figuring out the Democrats’ strategy right now.
Jon: It looks to me like our players are getting into the game.
Bill: Too into it, if you ask me. A lot of the plays they’re making out here tonight are overly strategic. They’ve lost sight of the big picture. On both sides. Not just one.
Jon: But I don’t see any danger here, Bill, for Obama. Look at the crowd. I’ve seen cuttlefish get more riled up than this.
Bill: You’re right. Obama’s not going to lose any points on this one. As long as gas prices are low, this crowd could care less where you drill.
Jon: I’m seeing a few surprised faces out there. Earlier in the game, Obama shot for an international climate change treaty and swiped at McCain’s proposition to drill off the Florida coast. I guess some people thought he’d stick to his principles.
Bill: That’s asking a lot, Jon. When you’ve got more than one player on the court, you can’t expect the point-guard to stick to his principles when the wings, the posts, and not to mention the audience, aren’t sticking to theirs’.
Jon: This is going to be a close game, Bill, with Obama throwing away points like this. But, you’ve got a point. Until the fans start crying for clean air, rivers and oceans instead of low gas prices, cheap clothes, cheaper food, and more, more, more, we’re going see a lot more plays like this. You see men and women in the stands; I see drill-bits with hot dogs and beer.
Bill: And there’s the buzzer. Here we go. The Democrat and Republican teams are out of the locker rooms and back onto the court. This game is still up in the air, let’s see what happens.
To be continued…